God's instrument

After I posted yesterday's story I thought I should post this one as well. A month or so ago I was at my parent's house letting my son ride dirt bike/ four wheeler with his cousins. It was a really hot and humid day. On my way home I thought maybe I should stop  by the cemetery to water the flowers I put at the boy's grave. I usually bring my own watering can filled with water because the water pump that is at the cemetery is really hard to get to work. You need a lot of muscle power and energy to get water to flow out so I really didn't want to stop since Scott wasn't with me to help but I pulled in anyway.
I was sweating like crazy and struggling to get the water to come out when I hear a voice say "I don't think that is working..." I look up and see an older gentleman walking towards me. He repeats himself and offers me the rest of the water he brought. We get to talking and I discover he had just lost his wife to cancer 21 days ago. The dirt on her grave site was still in a mound because it is not fully settled. This man's name was Charles. (Nathan's middle name) I could tell he loved his wife just like I love Scott. They had been together since they were 13 years old. Married 56 years. He was so distraught. He cried and just was still in such shock. He had so many questions. He didn't know what to do with himself. I tried to console him the best way I could. I told him it will get a little better each day. I reminded him Loretta was still with him everyday. She is still his wife. We talked about his children and grandchildren. We talked about the twins. I told him I go to Greenford Christian Church and there is a support group for widows and maybe it would help. I told him it didn't matter what his religion was or if he was religious at all. I told him it helps to talk to other who have gone through the same things you have. We talked for at least 20 minutes. At the end of conversation he confirmed directions to the church- he said he was familiar where it was at. He gave me a hug.
I hope I helped this gentleman I met at the cemetery- whether it was for 1 minute, 1 hour or 1 day. I continue to pray for Charles and hope he is healing and getting signs from his loved Loretta that she is OK and waiting for him.
Thank you God for making me pull in the cemetery that day! Watering the flowers is not why I went there. I went there to help console a man who just lost his wife.

Earrings

Yesterday Carter and I went to the 11 o'clock service at Greenford Christian. Sometimes I let him come to the adult service instead of the children's program. Today I wanted him to go to the children's program so he wouldn't have to just sit there and be quiet and not move all around. I dropped him off in his classroom and headed over to the main building for service. I picked my seat in my usual spot/section/side. I sat down and there was no one around me yet.  I see tons of other people chatting with each other and big families coming in and sitting down and I start to feel bad like there was a big spotlight on me. Service starts and more and more people start piling in the church. I'm estimating there are approximately 300 people that attend the 11 o'clock service on any given Sunday. So we sing 2 songs and sit down. As soon as I sit down a couple with a baby carrier come and sit in the aisle right in front of me. "Great..." I think "This baby is going to upset me" "Why did they have to sit right in front of me in the huge church" Then I look at the woman's earrings. They were doves. Each ear had a beautiful dove earring. There they were- my boys.
I look down at my bracelet and the two doves on it - it is on the same arm as my tattoo with the boy's names and two doves. I knew this was God working through this woman and her earrings. It sounds a bit ridiculous but I know this is why that woman put on those earrings this morning and sat directly in front of me. I no longer felt lonely. My boys were there with me. I stared at those earring the entire service.
Their daughter was hands down one of the cutest and happiest babies I have ever seen. I knew she was around the age Nathan would of been had he been born in March. When this baby looked in my eyes and smiled at me I almost felt like it was Nathan saying "Don't worry Mom, I am so happy in Heaven and having the best time!" Looking at this baby girl brought me joy and it was amazing to have that feeling again when looking at a baby.
I was so compelled tell this woman what she has done for me today. I was nervous though. "Is she going to think I am a crazy!?" I just HAD to tell her though. When service was over and I say "Excuse me, I have to tell you the dove earrings you are wearing have brought so much comfort to me today. I lost twin boys earlier this year and they come to me in the form of doves" I show her my bracelet and my tattoo. Her eyes immediately well with ears as do mine. I say "There's a reason you sat in front of me today- Thank you". She hugged me, said "I am so sorry" then put her hand on my face and just looked into my eyes like she could feel my pain. It is a moment I will never forget. God used this caring woman, this stranger, to remind me my boys are not dead, they are Alive!

God is Great.